This article is written by Kabir Yadav, a student, Former Integration Developer at Infosys & Deloitte, Views are personal

In ancient India women choose a man as her husband from a group of suitors (method commonly know as   ‘Svayamvara’  ) and the unselected man leave the venue without getting offended. As a man they respect the women decision, they don’t bind it with their ego or self-respect. Now think can we organize a Svayamvara for a girl today, I think no, because she may be attack by acid from the unselected men 😶

Okay now lets come to the 21st Century, our very own century. Good morning readers , I hope you people are doing absolutely good. In today’s blog post, I have talked about the increasing crime against women by men ( definitely not by all men )  in our country and also have attempted to share some laymen solution as per my understanding.

From last one month the newspapers and the digital media are flooded with news reports of crimes against women by the so called Men (because in real they are not man, I can’t consider them a man who can’t handle a rejection or a no). Whether a girl being chopped into pieces by her live in partner or  acid attack on a 17 year old girl just because she stop talking to a man or  a married women being killed for dowry or a women being slapped by his husband multiple times Infront of his son just because she blow the cake candle light before time. These are those cases which has been reported or get acknowledge after getting viral on social media but there are many other women who are facing such challenges in their day to day life.

Life has changed drastically in today’s digital world but what not changed is that even today man fall in love with every pretty face. Internet helps man to get a women sitting on his couch, they just need to choose the right platform. They don’t need to give too much efforts like during earlier days when man have to proof his superiority to get just a single  women. And even some decades before i.e. during 90’s, Man keep sitting on “chai ki Tapri” – a Tea Stall for hours just to see his crush but today you can see thousands of pretty face just by scrolling reels. This easy availability of women helping some man to always being ready to leave a women after being in a relationship for some time and when they failed to leave her because of some constitutional rules or because of any other reason they start domestic violence against them. Women becoming an object for them.

You can relate it with Sradha Walker case, where her partner start dating some another girl through some dating app when ever he fight with her. In short in life if you get something easily you can’t respect it. Its a human nature.

Men’s  Love as the time passes in a relationship 😋

House wife or the non working women, who are not financial independent or the women who comes from the weaker section of the society or from a orthodox family where it is being said that “पति परमेश्वर होता है “ – that means husband is god, domestic violence against these women are common because there the men know that even if he illtreat her she can’t left him. Women are forced to live in such condition because if they leave the man where will they go ? All these ill effects of the society and women’s compulsion is being used by some men to commit domestic violence and even commit some heinous crime against women.

Just some Suggestion ,

Dear Women,

Now a days you people need to be more vigilant, don’t be in a hurry to start a relationship, don’t fall in love with some one just after some chit chat on social media. Never  share personal things through social media no matter how close and faith you have on somebody, because you don’t know when their love converts to hate and they start using these things against you. Frankly speaking if some one genuinely cares for you they will never ask you for any such action.

Try to be financially Independent. Never left your job just because of someone else pressure. Life’s half of the problem is solve if you have money in your hand 😊

You need to catch the red flags and be ready to make a distance when it is required. Don’t wait too much like Sradha Walker. Have some close people to whom you can trust and share your problems when require. Don’t be just a silent spectator. Never completely cut off from your very own people. Those who love you don’t cut you off from your most trusted people.

Dear Man,

A real masculinity is in the fight which is fought to save others not in slapping a women, a real masculinity is in letting them go who wants to go from your life not in throwing acid on someone who wants to go out of your life.

Let me tell you one thing, if somebody betray you or they want to leave you. Let them go, never chase and never beg or ask them to stay in your life, control your emotions before it control your intelligence and No need to fill bad or fill inferior just because some one left you. Trust me, people also leave those people whom they cant afford. It may be possible that you are a too expensive product for them 😊

Being a man you have many more responsibility which is much, much more then just to get a girl. Don’t make a women center of your life.  If you are a capable man or even if  you are just a  genuine man, I can tell you you will get a much better women may not be today but definitely one day. Till then just concentrate on your dreams, Stay focused, go after your dreams and keep moving toward your goals. Achieve some thing big and don’t stop until you are proud.

TATA 👋